I’m not an #Ableist but…

It’s time I quite literally wheeled Stella out again. The world needs a replacement for the blunt but very funny woman she was. This is the woman who got drunk, fell out of her chair & broke her wrist. No regrets aside from spilling her wine.

Anyway, this evening Facebook and I clashed. Ok, not actually Facebook,  but someone posting on it. I usually just roll my eyes and move on, but sometimes I forget that this is the internet and try to explain to people why their words might be misconstrued as offensive, or why in fact they are being a dickhead. In fact, to save you reading further: TLDR; don’t be a dickhead.

However, for the more literary…

Just a quick reminder of standards for talking to, about, or around those with disabilities  (and like ninjas, you won’t always be aware of our presence):

– The “at least you’re not that person” style of motivation speech is not well received when done in front of that person. That speech is best described as a clusterfuck.


– we are wheelchair users. Not wheelchair bound. Not in public anyway… don’t Google it. Unless you’re into that kind of thing.


– on a similar note, I can call me a cripple as can my disabled friends. It’s our word.  Only a ginger can call another ginger ginger?


– if I call you out for being ableist and you are not disabled, you don’t get to tell me that all disabled people would agree with you. Because one just didn’t. That’s not activism, that’s maths. Let’s be honest, If I call you out on it, I’m probably going to be nicer about it than half of Twitter. I won’t even c bomb you the first time 😉


Now watch Stella. Go on. Off you go.

Don’t Be Remembered As The Prime Minister Who Let Children Drown

I read the comments on a local Facebook page today with increasing shame that I live somewhere with such little compassion for other humans.

Just proof that anything you put on the Internet, stays there (I’ve given the OP some anonymity).


Then after people arguing for humanity etc. This.



No matter which bits of me tried to detach themselves from my body today (Toes!  Wtf? Stay in my foot!), I do get to end my day gazing out of this window in a room that is warm, in a house where my children are safe, in a town that isn’t under seige, in a country where I don’t risk being killed, raped or tortured just because of my religion or lack thereof.


And yet we are faced with hundreds of people fleeing just that. Their homes have been destroyed, their family members killed or worse. And those who live securely in our warm houses in this green and pleasant land feel it their given right to spew bile against them just because they are different.

I don’t claim to know an awful lot about Islam. I do know that when I was in the middle east, those men I did meet who were both Muslim & Christian were far more respectful of me than a great number of men I’ve encountered here. Over here, I’ve been leered at, groped, and had appalling things yelled out of white vans since my early teens. (Perks of getting older & more decrepit – less groping!). I also know that up until fairly recently, Catholic women were required to cover their hair at least in church. Not many people seen snatch the scarves being handed out to women who visit cathedrals where you are required to dress modestly.


I  don’t have the spoons to go picking fights with these people, but reading constant comments fuelled by fear of difference just makes me annoyed about having to share oxygen with them.

So, on a day when I finally pressed the go button on getting the wheels, I’m counting my blessings.  I’d rather hang about like a floppy brain in a jar than have my home and family destroyed.

Does Not Play Well With Others

I’m going to explain this here. Once. And then I’m walking away from it. There is a Facebook Page named ‘Infants’ which is causing a huge parental storm in a teacup online (ironically, mostly on Facebook!).

Why am I ranting? Because I’ve tried putting people’s minds at rest on a variety of places but people insist on running around like headless chickens shouting “what about the children?!?”. Any attempt to explain calmly and logically how the Facebook API works is met with further hysterics about photos of children being stolen.

For once and for all, please people of the Internet, stop being morons.

Firstly, your images have NOT been stolen, rather they have been linked to. And the link shows itself as a thumbnail of your photo on a webpage.

Secondly, Facebook uses your own user settings to decide who can view these pages. If you set your photo to friends only, ONLY friends will see it.

This is known as dynamically created content and is coming to a browser near you. We’ve already got used to targeted marketing – why is every advert I see online about shoes and tech? Take a wild guess. It’s based on the stuff I post about and like online.

Scared that they are linking to your private content? How many of you use an app to view your facebook account? Does it scare you that this app can show you all your private stuff? No? Why not? It uses exactly the same technology as the generated page. Or in clearer terms, a generated page is no more evil than using an app to log into your Facebook account.

Users of the Internet, the sky is not falling. Please calm down. And if you are still hugely concerned about child safety online, have a good long read through this site: http://www.thinkuknow.co.uk which is set up and run by CEOP (Child Exploitation & Online Protection UK). Whilst you’re there, get your kids to read the kids section.