Don’t Feed The Trolls

Aww I made it as a fully fledged blogger today with a little passive agressive hate post all of my own. It’s like the internet has accepted me as one of their own. Now, the standard reaction to the comments section on anything is “don’t feed the trolls”, and yet repeating this didn’t exactly work, so I’m going to chuck a couple of statements on here, just in case anyone other than me or Mr Geek reads this.

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I write this blog for me.
Much of my blogging is an electronic format of diary writing. It’s a stream of consciousness which is rarely edited, nor proof read. At most, it’s occasionally written to explain what’s going on to my friends and family.

This is not my job. You don’t pay to read my blog, I’m not here to entertain you, so if you aren’t finding anything interesting or useful, read something else. If however,Β  I happen to entertain you, make you feel less alone with a chronic illness or highlight something useful,Β  then welcome to my metaphorical tree house – make yourself at home.

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Photo credit domesticatedmomster

I’m self obsessed here, so I don’t have to be elsewhere.

There areΒ  number of scientific, peer reviewed articles about the benefits of blogging for your mental health. Personal blogs are seen as a safe space in which to let out your inner thoughts and fears without needing to find the words verbally. It’s also a place to verbalise those things which if left bottled up, would niggle away at your state of mind and turn you into an unpleasant person. These reports identify that those who use a personal blog to talk frankly about themselves have a higher level of perceived social support. For me, I have made contact with a wonderful support network who support each other.

In real life, I put on a brave face and get on with my life.

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Once you post online, you no longer have control of it.

Probably the most important lesson I teach my kids. It doesn’t matter if you later regret what you post as there’s this thing called a screen capture.

I hope this particular troll isn’t actually a troll & just another person struggling with EDS who felt wronged by my willingness to call people out on their ill treatment of service users, or felt that they have it worse and as such my open grief over the loss of my previous life is unjustified. I’ll give them the benefit of that doubt because EDS is crappy and without somewhere to vent, can make you angry and defensive.

But through the magic of the screen capture, here is that now undeletable comment.

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And for transparency, my response.

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You probably need your own blog, because after a day of receiving some of the most beautiful private messages of support from my friends since I posted that response, I’ve written another self-absorbed and mindnumbingly boring post which has released all that negativity into the ether.

You won for about 4 hours. After that, my blog won and then there was this:

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16 thoughts on “Don’t Feed The Trolls

  1. Exactly what you said! I love your blog and am thankful you share it. I understand this is your space to freely express yourself: keywords being “your space”.

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  2. Dear Mrs Hippy Geek,

    I love your blog, it isn’t self absorbed or a cure for insomnia. It is a terrible shame that people feel the need to pull out the “I’m sicker than you” card or the “my situation is worse” card.

    I have had this kind of comment myself, when I happened to mention that my husband and I had held a party, (we hold one every six months so that I get to see everyone twice a year). My troll told me that I couldn’t be as sick as I portrayed myself as they just couldn’t have held a party as they were too sick. I allowed the comment, despite the hurt it caused me (very much like you) and replied that the parties only happen because my husband does the majority of the work, my friends help out on the night (sorting their own drinks and food) and I have a programme of enforced rest before and after. I was very wounded for a few days after this very insightful person who doesn’t know me decided to judge my entire life on one blog post.

    I believe I know the identity of your troll should you wish this person to be identified, unfortunately she is known in EDS circles, for telling everyone how awful her life is compared to everyone elses. Just email me and your troll will be unmasked.

    I like you, find that my blog is a way of expressing myself and keeping myself sane.

    Keep up the sterling work that you are doing and I am so glad to have found your blog. You have me in stitches most days with your take on life. Everything you write I can identify with.

    And to you troll, get back under the bridge from whence you came. If you are going to comment on a blog piece ensure you actually read it first, otherwise you look a fool and stop boring everyone with your pity posts.

    Much love to you and the family Mrs Hippy Geek,

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    • Rachel,
      That is such a lovely comment. Thank you!

      I don’t wish to unmask my troll at all, because I’m not sure it would actually do any good. It’s a shame that she feels like that and I feel sorry for her that she can’t enjoy the company and support of you and other people here. It must be lonely under that bridge.

      Having a party like that sounds like such a good idea! I prefer going out, so someone else gets to tidy up afterwards! I’m glad you didn’t let your troll get to you as I live reading your updates πŸ™‚

      Much love back

      Liked by 1 person

      • Oh I don’t clear up!!! I am lucky someone always stays behind and helps hubby. I am really lucky to have such a great bunch of friends. They may not understand my collection of conditions but understand the physical limitations.
        Keep on blogging! Together we shall change the world!
        Rach xx

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Jeebus H Cripes. Maybe your troll and my troll are the same person or closely related. How dare you have a different perspective and attitude. How dare you have some insight and how dare you be positive about any of it.
    I actually took a step back from blogging about my experiences with Lyme Disease after someone came out of the woodwork to belittle me a little about not being sick enough for their taste. I guess I just never felt it necessary to tell everyone about every single ache and pain and “moment” and rather focus on most of the aches and pain and how I was still seeking out the silver lining and trying to live.
    Damn us.
    Oh and I totally stole your last pic. πŸ™‚

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    • That pic is awesome. I really want to learn to embroider just to make one!

      I considered stopping for a while, but then decided that she can stick her opinion firmly up her bum.

      I’d never heard of Lyme until I read your blog. It makes you realise what delicate squishy creatures we actually are!

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  4. Um, just wow. That screenshot comment…well, it speaks for itself. People never cease to amaze me. I mean seriously, if you don’t have anything nice to say-than don’t say it at all. Are people 8 years old in their thinking and actions. I have haters too. Let me tell ya, they are actually your FANS because they watch everything you do!! πŸ˜‚ I enjoyed your entry, and please, please keep writing my fellow zebra!! Hang tough πŸ’ͺ🏽 xoxo. Looking forward to following you πŸ‘πŸ½

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  5. Hey there HippyGeek. Feel your pain here….that’s just NUTS what that troll said. Screw the haters, you keep doing you. You’re right blog is catharsis. I blog for me too, try to make sense of things occasionally and give people something to think about. It’s all gravy. πŸ™‚

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