Dear Friends Inside My Phone,

There was a campaign some time ago to ‘look up’. This encouraged people to stop staring at their phones and look around them. I like this idea. I love the idea of just being in the moment as my kids run through piles of autumn leaves as I ignore my batphone. But let me show you the reality of today.

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Dysautonomia is telling me to chill the hell out today. I woke up at 6.30am with every intention of having a normal day & heading off for work, but it had other plans and whacked my internal temperature up (or rather told me I was boiling when my actual temperature was fine), and made my head spin. I lasted less than 20 minutes of sweating, palpitations and tunnel vision before I gave up and went back to bed before I barfed on everyone.

Mr Geek set a desk fan up to help me “cool down” and I slept off the weirdness. Eventually, I woke up at lunchtime, shivery because now I’m cold (wtf?) & the blinds are still closed because muting everything keeps this lovely spinning headache at tolerable levels.

This old man is channelling my energy levels today & keeping me company instead of his usual harassing of Mr Geek in his office. (Cuddles are demanded which is great whilst on an important Skype call).

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“The phone can’t be helping”. Not normally no, but a fellow blogger showed me a brilliant android app called Twilight which puts this red overlay on the screen. This can be constant for times like this when my head hurts, or you can set it to work with your local sunset & sunrise times to stop the blue light from your phone interfering with sleep patterns.

And herein lies the thing. Not being able to be a social butterfly due to a lack of spoons (and inclination), the friends on my phone are part of an intricate support network that retains a fair amount of my sanity. This is a thank you to them.

When I have down days, they send me messages letting me know I’m not on my own & they utterly get why I’m venting on my blog. They join in with me laughing at myself. They let me know that my frustrated rants made them laugh.

Just today, I’ve been able to reach out to onlinr support groups without moving from my bed to worry about this latest dysautonomia flare, and be totally reassured that it’s just me overdoing things. Just from that, I feel less panicked and validated for not pushing through and getting Mr Geek to drive me to work.

Some people I’ve never met & yet know some of the most personal parts of their lives, and vice versa.

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Others I’ve known for years, but the portal of communication has allowed us to go from that person I know of to friends.

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Sometimes people just pop on and let me know I’m not on my own.

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Others I’ve met online many years ago through gaming & then in person & then am really sad that they live so far away. Basically because I miss them.

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Then there’s Mrs Gypsytree who now lives a million miles away and yet I still get to talk to her every day because of this little screen in front of me.

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It’s not all blogging. Facebook groups have enabled me to meet real life people locally who are going through the same crap & share a common interest in cake despite it wrecking our systems.

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Then there’s the occasional tweet or like from someone online that makes everything go squeee!

Like someone liking my blog when it’s about them πŸ™‚

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Or when TinyPants drew a get well card to a blogger in Canada when she had surgery & I found out that she saw it πŸ™‚

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Or when Catherine Russell (Serena in Holly city) liked a tweet πŸ™‚

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You see? The intended purpose of the internet was to share ideas widely and without boarders. It’s now far more than that, and yes there are things happening in the real world, and yes there are some awful things online, but there are also some amazing support networks that people don’t get to see.

So next time you see someone apparently ignoring the world and smiling at their phones,Β  don’t assume it’s just a funny cat, it could just be the human contact that they needed.

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