Day two and three are the worst I’m advised. Just keep drinking water. Right oh.
Morning – woke up hungry. Not interested in coffee, give me my shake! Half a shake later (I’m now making them with 200ml of water, 8 ice cubes and half measure of powder), I’m sated.
Get kids ready for school. LSH on lunchbox duty as I can’t bear to smell the food. LSH promptly makes himself a cheese omelette for breakfast. Bastard.
Sporty running friend arrives and we head out for a swim. I manage 20 mins of breast stroke before my back is screaming stop! No matter, there’s Powerhoop later!
Get back & have another half measure of strawberry foam protein yuck.
Get ready for Powerhoop class. Eat half a box of grazebox black pepper pistachios to prevent fainting in class.
Go to Powerhoop and discover that using a multicoloured hoop to tenderise the flesh on your waist is a very funny, if rather painful experience (photos of bruise belt to follow).
Arrive home. Drink another half ass flavoured shake.
Feel wobbly. Eat a babybel (60 cals, all protein).
Hate this diet.
Rest of nuts.
Go out to buy salad & collect the kids. Bloody hell I want to eat that salad now…
Go out to have nails done. Have a headache and feel awful. Seriously consider shoving my face in the family sized bag of M&Ms in the kitchen. Resist.
Make chicken salad with no tomatoes (they have carbs) with olive oil & balsamic creame topped with sunflower seeds.
LSH asked if I want anything from the shop. I answer “bread, pasta, CHIPS”. He says no. He clearly doesn’t love me. He’s left me to die of potato deficiency while I put the kids to bed. I’m too knackered to even get cross at them for arsing about.
Go on without me followers. Tell people I made it through without the carbs. Tell my
bread rolls children I love them. The second day was the hardest.