It’s been a week since my last (and very emotional) day at the school. And it’s taken me quite some time to recover.
We’ve been in Valencia now for just under a week and I’m just reaching the point of letting go. Last night was a pivotal point in my mental state as I donned my swimsuit, put on music and walked into the pool and fell (purposefully) into the deep water where I floated with a real sense of peace. Today I noticed other things too:
For the first time in over three years I’ve read (and finished) a book for pleasure. Not for book club, or on a recommendation, or for reference. It was utter pap that was reviewed by Heat and I loved every page.
I can sit quietly for more than 10 minutes without panic rising in me like lava. I’ve finally stopped fidgeting all the time.
I’m singing around the house and couldn’t care less who hears me. I also threw all caution to the wind today and bought an itsy bikini and actually wore it (It’ll look better once I’ve toned up, but that won’t happen in a week!).
I can hold more than a glass of wine without feeling wobbley. In fact, I can drink several glasses of fizz and feel perfectly in control!
I have colour in my face without any make-up. And not just a tan, but colour which has taken away the bags from under my eyes.
I’m eating like a normal person – over the last few days I have weaned myself off of the comforting carbs that have helped me balloon over the past few years. I’m not calorie counting, but eating fresh vegetables, either raw or grilled with few starchy additions. And I’ve had very few moments where I’ve been racked with hunger (or had massive mood swings) despite the drastically reduced calories.
I’ve made the right decision. For me, for my family, and for my health.