Something has gone awry. Anyone who says that teachers have a nice cushy number ought to count the number of hours I have spent with my children since Sunday night when they went to bed.
I can tell you, because I worked it out. Discounting kissing them goodnight as they slept, 70 minutes in total. That’s 15 minutes each morning while I ingest enough coffee to make me fit to drive to work and 10 minutes for two nights this week when they snuck down to say goodnight.
What’s worse is I feel like I’m not being committed enough, because I’m openly complaining (only on here). I felt obliged to answer emails at 11pm and beyond last night, knowing that I needed to be up by 6am.
I know that I’m doing the absolute best for my family by being a working parent, but that parent bit is beginning to feel a bit fraudulent. I’m not really parenting anymore. How can you parent for 70 minutes a week? Apparently, spending a week hooked up to heart monitors wasn’t enough to scare me into taking it easier. It was enough to make me ‘think’ about it and realise there’s an issue, but so far I’ve yet to come up with a feasible plan of action, other than give everything up and live in a yurt.
This isn’t very in line with my attempt at being zen, but I’m too tired to put any perspective on this. I’m not being very rational, or logical. I’m too bloody tired to bring logic into this argument. I just pulled a 13 hour day plus travel (I’ll admit Thursday does contain my favourite part of the week when we do open IT activities and let the kids loose on random bits of tech like raspberry Pi and makey makeys – that’s a whole other post though).
The fact is I will cope, I will get up extra early tomorrow to wish midget a happy birthday and make her that special birthday breakfast before I leave at 7am, I will get through the 14 hour day plus travel tomorrow, I will teach the classes to the best of my ability, I will converse with parents and actually I won’t lose my temper. Why? Because that’s what you have to do.
Stiff upper lip and all that. We are, after all, British.